Best Buy: With Her in Mind

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Bethany Kinsella recently attended the St. Catherine's Leadership Challenge and writes about  - How do you demonstrate your leadership to yourself, to others, at work?  In other words, how do you show up?  

“Girls ARE smart” exclaims my 7 year old son to me this past Fall rendering me speechless in a split second.  ‘Why would he EVER think differently?’ I thought to myself as I go through all the various scenarios in my head to justify why he SHOULD NOT even have those thoughts in his head.  Just as I am about to offer a long speech about equal rights I pause and calmly respond, ‘Of course we are - - what makes you say that?’  His eyes shining responds ‘Well, YOU fixed the home theater system. Your friends [male] came over and they couldn’t figure it out, you asked Daddy to look at it and he couldn’t figure it out, but YOU did - - and now we get to watch a movie! Can we have some popcorn?’ as he skips down the stairs to join his sister to watch our first movie using our home theater room.   Wow.  How I missed that one.   

I was reminded of this exchange this past week when I attended St. Catherine University’s Leadership Challenge Conference, a day of education and dialogue for professional women eager to bring their leadership to the next level.  While there were a number of take-aways throughout the day, the theme that stood out to me was - - How do you demonstrate your leadership to yourself, to others, at work?  In other words, how do you show up?

 

In the scenario with my son, he saw me ask a number of friends (who just happen to be male) to help with the set up of the home theater all while emphasizing they were really smart, they would be able to set up the theater and we could watch the movie.  Yet, I didn’t even make an effort to even try until one Sunday afternoon after 5 other people had failed and I was frustrated by the long wait.  Now I wouldn’t have even guessed that he would come to the conclusion that girls aren’t smart, but I can honestly say that little statement opened my eyes and I am much more aware of my non verbal cues that may inadvertently lead my kids to a wrong conclusion about women.

During the keynote speeches and breakout sessions, I was reminded that leadership development has 3 interconnected elements:  Self Awareness, Relationships & Connections, and Creativity.

 

Self Awareness: The number one prediction of leadership success.  By rediscovering yourself every day, you are able to learn and grow; adapt and change in the moment.

 

Relationships & Connections:  The connection to yourself and to others.  All people:

o    Want to be seen

o    Have a deep need of belonging

o    Need to integrate all aspects by having the ability to bring all that we are.

 

Creativity:  Enable the ‘new and different’ or encourage varied approaches to drive different outcomes

The role of a leader is to create an environment where these 3 interconnected elements thrive.  In the craziness of everyday activities it’s very easy to inadvertently lead people to wrong conclusions by what is said or done - - but if you:

·         Listen, seek to understand and reflect

·         Create an environment or culture where people feel seen, respected and can bring their

          whole selves to the situation

·         Have the courage to be creative in solving problems

 

It creates opportunities for everyone to learn and grow (and further prove that women and girls are INDEED smart!)